This American Life

...Is a fantastic podcast I listen to. On this week's episode the topic is choosing wrong.


The first gentlemen on the show is discussing marriage and it really stood out to me so I'm going to write down some of the thoughts he shares...


"Be incredibly forgiving for the weird behavior that's going to start coming out. You will be very unhappy lots of ways.


Your partner will fail to understand you. If you're understood you may be 60% of your soul by your partner, that's fantastic. Don't expect that it's going to be 100%.


Of course you will be lonely, you will often be in despair. You will sometimes think its the worst decision in your life, that's fine, that's not a sign your marriage has gone wrong. It's a sign that it's normal, it's on track.


And many of the hopes that took you into the marriage will have to die in order for the marriage to continue.  That some of the heaviness and expectation will have to die. It's very dark but in love darkness is a real friend of relationships because so many of the problems of love come from unwarranted optimism so we need to be dark..."




I know I was only married a short time but I still feel like I have learned so much about marriage. I love the idea of it and the above readings seem true but if that's the case than why the fuck would anyone WANT to get married, I mean what's the point other than loneliness? That's what I'm trying to figure out.