Hope

 Trying to have it for life. Just exhausted fighting thoughts everyday. 

Strange

 I miss him. Or who I thought he was, who he said he wanted to be. That man was fire. I’m so confused. I love him one day, fine and enlightened the next…what is real and to trust..:

I read a quote…

I had the best memories in life with you, now you are a memory. I have known you two years and will remember you forever.

This is the first weekend he hasn’t text since we broke up. Why am I sad. 

I hate everything about this.

Cookin and plants

 Still trying to get my head on straight. I love him. Need distractions.

Beauty

 Love my walks and flower time…kitty cuddles. Finished stranger things. Now how long for season 5!

Thoughts

 

You have the nerve to say I broke you. You broke yourself. I am the woman laying in bed hugging your photo going to sleep it’s the only peace I can feel to sleep right now. Do you know what it’s like to come in to someone’s life that gives you everything and to fight the thoughts justifying why you spoke to them the way you did thinking it’s your fault. You have me, my heart, my soul, my being and I love you more than any man I’ve ever known and you have a piece of me I’ll never be able to love another man the same with myself whole again. 

But you think I’m the one to blame, I broke you…interesting. You will never understand. I will always be the bad guy and that’s the worst part while you’re at the bars drowning your so-called “sorrow”, I am the one in bed alone hugging your photo because you couldn’t be a better man..

A day at a time

Cucumbers growin, neighborhood kitties, juicy home grown  tomatoes…

Another 4th come and gone

 Left a toxic relationship, had some naps and beers.

Bourbon tasting

 Did a bourbon tasting at my parents :) me and mom made yummy snacks including my first bruschetta. Sat on the porch after with the cool breeze, sunset and conversation. Was lovely.